Poor Keith
My good friend Keith Proctor introduced me to The Brittas Empire, and to begin with, in those first few seconds where Keith told me all about the premise – a sports centre ran by, essentially, the world’s most irritating maniac, and staffed by people like Colin, who was literally rotting from the inside out… – I was worried. Worried because Keith could be awfully passionate about really rubbish things, and he was just one of those people you get who buys a tracksuit and thinks that green and pink looks really cool when worn all over you. Poor Keith, I haven’t seen him for ages, but I pray he’s got rid of that thing now.
So I trod carefully, and on that first episode I didn’t expect much.
But it was good. I loved it right away. I loved the humour, and the jokes, and even…dare I say it: Colin the dodgy and highly unhygienic caretaker. When that show ended I was devastated. But I own every episode on DVD now so I don’t mind too much, to tell you the truth.
Will there ever be a series as good as that ever again? I don’t think so. It wasn’t just the jokes. It was also the timing of when it came out, just before the rules on what you could show on TV became much stricter. Because of this they were able to do things which would be impossible, or very frowned-upon now. I’ll never stop loving The Brittas Empire, but chances are that I’ll never love it as much as Keith. Which, now I come to think about it, is undoubtedly a very good thing…
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